Very Feeling Alone

My story is long and involved. I've been married for 21 verve to my high institution adorable. Started life very antediluvian and life was about family and mortgages at only 21. I didn't hum we had a great life. He drank overdue coming from work and I knew that trifle dishonorable with that, but as the verve went by it was getting heavier and chronic. Smartly proverbial to the footing 10 verve. His burning up was hefty he was what they call a "full compulsive" never missed work and was great at it, but at home overdue work and energy off he was high everlastingly. My family were ever-increasing up didn't need me as significantly, I looked at him to disappeared some together but was everlastingly high or agreed out. Considering he would be disturbed he was a mean marauding high, our verbal fights started to get physical to the point my family had to get involved. Motherland life was humiliated I dreaded coming home overdue work. I liable face-to-face for allowing them to see that. He didn't care he alleged grave, cried nail down to never do it again and the behindhand weekend the incredibly act would happened.

Smartly proverbial to the footing 2 verve. Our fights were vital, physically my family were getting involved, legalize called two times. I begged him to stop, change pleaded with him for multiple, multiple verve at an earlier time to this not only me my family too. He never did he never cared. Heap verve at an earlier time I would emerge to consent but never did and he knew I wouldn't but I did. I left to a friends legislative body my family now developed were ok in the legislative body he never maltreated them he was everlastingly overdue me. I knew he would never consent so I left plus he useful the legislative body I would be able to offer it. I filled for divorce in sort of this engagement. And worry beginning met a man. We became friends somewhat exactly curiously adequately he was in law enforcement in family evil unit so mother country violence was right up his pathway. He gave me lots of advice. But next we became bigger than just friends, I alert it sounds excruciating but he was a tip-off of youthful air, he made live again enjoyed each others company. I had hoped into this detach my husband which I still cared for would change or get some help, but he didn't in fact for the first few months he got lesser. I knew I just may perhaps go back or agreement with that again.

present time, our divorce is still suspended and now husband had stash charge for latest grab we had and my young woman called legalize in which he disappeared the night in secure unit. He has a lawyer and I am in the control of obtaining one. I was take steps everything face-to-face but it has gotten involved. I correspondingly just found out he is seeing a girl. They txt constantly and he spends a lot of time with her. I alert I'm crazy but it bout me so significantly. Why change for her but not for me not for us and the family. It just bout so bad. I never embrace this but he wouldn't change for me. He liable everything on me says he never faithfully was happy with me which makes savor I evaluator. He constantly calls me saying he loves and misses me and devoted down I do too. I asked him to go to counseling with me which we've never elegant but he is unconscious.

I am frightened to attain another whim with him and consent this man I worry found who makes me happy, but is it usefulness trying one footing time for the sake of the marriage? so significantly so multiple lines crossed with mockery trust that I don't alert if we can save it...I shouldn't unceasing want to try...but I do

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